The 70th Hunger Games: The Making of a Rebel
by Somora Lane
Summary: Mabel Ramour is a fighter. Her brother was a fighter, but he's dead. The Games took him and now it's her turn. And she wins. Now she's amoung the youngest victors. She quickly finds that the hardest part of the Games comes after you leave the arena and that having a big heart is the most dangerous thing you can do.
1. Chapter 1

I wake up and run through my life in my head, as I have since I was 11.

_My name is Mabel Ramour. I am 14. I live in District 10, Panem. I lived with my parents and older brother, John. He was in the 67__th__ Hunger Games and he was 17. He made it to the final 3, but was killed. Which was an "upmost pity" in the Capitol; they had loved him. My mother wasn't the same afterwards. She got easily distracted and lost in her thoughts. She died in a herding accident a year later. Afterwards, at the age of 11 and a half, I was "adopted" by a rich-ish family that took pity on me, the Furrows. My dad had taught me loads of survival skills; before he disappeared … Today is the Reaping, and my name is in their 58 times more than last year making the total close to 200. The odds are not in my favor…_

By then I was awake and didn't feel like reliving my life again. I looked out the window and saw the soft golden glow of the sun beginning to rise. I got dressed in my usual outfit of jeans, an old gray shirt and an old forest green sweater. I pulled on my boots and quietly headed outside.

The district is always very quiet this early. As I stroll around aimlessly I can smell breakfasts being prepared. By the time people started coming out of their homes, the sun was a large gold disk on the horizon that basks everything in its golden light. I wave hello to everyone I pass and then head back to the Furrows' place. They have no kids, which is probably why they took me in. They're nice people but, I miss my family too much to accept them as my family.

Mrs. Furrow is starting breakfast when I walk in the door: pancakes and ham. The smell wafts over me and makes my mouth water, that is, until I remember why we are having ham: the Reaping. I always forget about it, but, how can I? How can I forget when it marks the fourth anniversary of when I last saw John, alive and well in person? The memory of that day still haunts me.

"How was your walk?" asked Mrs. Furrow, distracting me.

I smile as pleasantly as I can and say, "Wonderful."

"That's wonderful, dear. Now go wash up. Breakfast will be ready in a few minutes."

I walk through the kitchen to the sink and wash my hands. Then I set the table and get the morning milk from the front stoop. When I come back in, we all sit and eat. After, Mr. Furrow heads to the very front of the building to open the shop for awhile: The Furrows' run the general store. Mrs. Furrow soon goes to join him and I leave to wander again.

A few hours later I come back and take a bath. I dried off and slipped into my reaping outfit: a pine green dress that goes down to my knees. I then braid my hair into one long braid that ends at my waist. I slip on my flat brown shoes and head back to the kitchen where the Furrows were waiting. Then we head out to the square before the Justice Building. I check in and go into the roped off section for 14 year old girls and wait. Soon enough, the stupid clip that reminds us why there is the Hunger Games. Then Gallia Happener speaks.

"Welcome, welcome. To-day we will be choosing the tributes that will represent District 10 in the 70th Hunger Games. First, the ladies." She walked over to the glass bowl with all the girls' names in it. I can feel the tension in the air, everyone hoping they won't get picked… It seems like it took forever for her to pick a slip of paper and walk back to the mike. "Mariah Packard." I freeze. I know who she is. She's 12, and oldest of 5. She's an angel, a sweetheart. I used to live next door to her; the Packards have already lost one child in the Games… It can't be her, it can't be…

"Are there any volunteers?"

Before I can even register what I'm doing, I step forward and call out, "I volunteer!"

Only then do I realize what I've done; as everyone turns to look at me, and Gallia beckons me forward. Dazed, I walk forward. I reach the steps of the Justice Building and climb up. I glace at Mariah and she's shaking her head and crying, as though in disbelief of what I'd done.

"What's your name, sweetheart?" asks Gallia, bringing me back to earth.

"Mabel Ramour." As I said my name, I could almost here they hush that fell over the Capitol. Another Ramour, another fighter. Even Gallia stays quiet for a few moments before choosing the boy tribute's name. "Ralf Hunan." No one volunteers, probably all still shocked at what I had just done; I know I am.

Next thing I know, I'm inside the Justice Building, in a room, by myself. After a minute or so, a Peacekeeper opens the door and lets in the Furrows. Still a bit dazed, I don't hear what they say and allow myself to be swallowed in a hug from Mrs. Furrow. Then they leave and Mr. and Mrs. Packard come in.

"Mabel, thank you. And don't worry too much. Your dad taught you well." said Mr. Packard. I murmur back, "Thanks." Then they leave too.

My dad. I remember him well. Tall, tan, bright blue green eyes, and dark honey colored hair, like mine. He had taught John and me simple survival tactics: how to make a fire, shoot a bow, throw knifes, make snares, among other things. No one ever told me what happened to him. One day when I was 8, he went to work, and never came home.

Then a Peacekeeper came in and interrupted my thoughts. He escorted me to the train, and I climbed on. I sat down in a chair and watched my district fly past.


	2. Chapter 2

After a few minutes, Ralf comes in, followed by Gallia, and a couple victors. They're going to be our mentors; Hannah Bock, victor from the 56th Games, and Nathaniel Pascoe, victor from the 43rd Games. They are almost always the mentors. Everyone sits down in the chairs near me.

"Don't look so worried, you two. We aren't even at the Capital yet," says Hannah Bock.

"Oh, aren't you excited?" says Gallia, in a high voice, as though insulted that we aren't. Neither of us says anything; and I can feel Ralf staring at me. Then Nathaniel Pascoe clears his throat.

"Alright, then. Ralf, I'll be your mentor and Hannah will be yours Mabel. Do you two want to start strategizing or anything?"

Neither Ralf nor I say anything or move, and can still feel his eyes boring into my skull. Then my stomach growls, and quite loudly.

"Oh, sorry. It's just I skipped lunch and - "

"Don't worry about it. Come on, let's go eat," says Hannah.

At that, we all leave for the dining car. Once there, we sit, eat, and listen to Gallia rattle off our schedule for the next few days. After I ate my fill, and nearly memorized the plans for the next week, I excuse myself and head off to my car to sleep. Thankfully, Ralf had stopped staring at me during the main course.

When I wake up, it's still dark and I'm covered in cold sweat. I lie on my back, and think. _ It was only a dream. No, a memory. The memory of my brother's bloody death. I had worked so hard to forget it… Why did I remember it? And why so vividly? The blood, his scream, and final stiff breaths, and most vividly, the spear in his stomach. _Then I realize why with a jolt; I am on my way to the Games. I can't sleep for the rest of the night.

At first light, I get up, and pull on some clothes. Then, I quietly make my way to the dining car, only to find that I'm not the only one up. Hannah and Nathaniel are up and chatting. They notice me, and we exchange a greeting. I sit, and help myself to some food. Hannah must have noticed how tired I was or something because she asked, "What's wrong?"

"Oh, nothing. I just had a bad dream."

"Do you want to talk about it?" she asked. I didn't reply because at that moment, Ralf came into the car. He sat down across from me and helped himself to some food after a mumbled, "Morning." Then Gallia came in, looking sickeningly chipper, as always. "We are almost to the Capitol. Once there, you will be prepped for the Parade tonight." Then she sat, ate, and after an hour, the windows went black. Next thing we could see were crowds of people, smiling and waving. I didn't wave back.

Soon enough we were whisked away to a hotel or something. Gallia was babbling the whole way, but I wasn't listening. Soon after, I found myself being measured, scrubbed, waxed, washed, cleaned, prepped, you name it, and it was done to me. Then they were gone, and I was alone. I wrapped my dressing gown tighter around me and walked over to the window. When I turned around, I jumped. There was a man standing by the door, looking me up and down. I assumed he is my stylist.

"Are you ready?" he asked.

"I guess so. I mean, I don't have a choice do I?" I reply. He gave a faint smile, and then started helping my into my Parade outfit: a ghastly baby blue cowgirl outfit, complete with a matching hat. Then the prep team came back in and applied the makeup. Next thing I know, I'm standing by a chariot with Ralf.

Moments later, we are on the chariot and moving forward. As we reach the exit, I can hear the Capitol citizens gasp when we come into view. Then they point at me and wave, shouting my name, over and over. In that moment, I realize I'll have no problem getting sponsors. The thought gives me some comfort, so I smile and wave back to the citizens. Soon enough, we reach the end and the chariots line up for the welcoming speech. I glance around looking at the other districts' costumes; I look at 12's and then, not believing my eyes, look back. _They are only wearing a heavy layer of coal dust._ Then President Snow begins to speak and I turn my attention toward him.

"Welcome to the 70th annual Hunger Games! Tributes, each of you has a chance to become victor and bring glory to you, your family, and your district…" Then he goes on with the usual: reminding us why we're here, how honorable it is, blah, blah, blah.

Then we're all whisked away to where the tributes stay and Ralf and I head up to the 10th floor. As soon as we reach our floor, I rip off my hat, the stupid shirt and kick off my shoes. Then I head to what I assume is my room in an undershirt and rip off the skirt. I head over to the dresser and grab a long lavender night gown. I step into the attached bathroom, and upon seeing my face, I decide it's better to just get in the shower to wash it off.

Half an hour later I emerge, pink and smelling strongly of roses. I dry off and pull on the night gown again. My damp hair clings to my back so I put it up in a messy bun. No one seems to be up, and I figure it's the same on the other floors. I've heard there is a roof-top garden that the District 12 tributes go up onto. Knowing there's lots of risk involved, I sneak up to the roof. The Capitol is truly breathtaking at night. Tall buildings can be seen in every direction and all are aglow with lights. I stare at the city for a long time, well over an hour, before creeping back down to my room. I crawl under the sheets and drift into an uneasy sleep.

Many hours later, I wake to find my room full of bright sunlight. I take in the beauty of the golden rays of sun before getting up and putting on brown pants and a baggy indigo top. I open my door and head to the main area of the floor, where a long table was set with plates of food. Everyone else was already up, and when they noticed me, they all said "Good Morning." I sat down opposite Ralf and began to put food on my plate.

"I guess you slept well," said Hannah.

I give her a brief quizzical look before asking, "What do you mean?"

"Well, it's nearly 9 and yesterday you were up before 7."

I giggle, but only halfheartedly. "Yea, I guess that means I slept well."

After that, no one else talks much except Gallia. "Today you're going to start your training, and then at the end of the week there are the interviews before the few days of individual practice and the individual scoring. So in two weeks you'll be in the area!" she said excitedly. I'd almost forgotten about the interviews and the scoring. And I hate how excited she is to watch us kill and die. It's sickening. Have Capitol people always been this dense? If so, I'm beginning to realize why the Districts revolted in the first place.


	3. Chapter 3

After breakfast, we head down to the training center. I noticed nearly all of the other tributes where there already; only 5 and 8 were missing. I glance around I realize I'm the youngest this year. Even Ralf is a few years older than me. Then the others showed up and that did not ease my nerves; they look older too. Everyone seems to be at least 16; everyone but me anyway. We were given an introduction to what we'll be doing over the following days. After, I head over to the snare station. I need to learn how to hunt. I spend the day there, after I found out that I'm quite horrible at making snares.

When we got back to our floor, I'm tired, my fingers are sore, and I am still frustrated with my failure at being able to make a proper snare. I had been able to make 1 good one at the end of the day, but it still wasn't all that great. We sat down to dinner and I filled my plate.

"Fun day?" asked Hannah.

"Hm? Oh, yea. Fun day," I said, my voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Well, what did you two do?"

"I spent the day learning how to throw a spear," Ralf said. "I'm horrible."

"I couldn't make a descent snare if the fate of the world depended on it."

"Oh, come on. You can't be that bad."

At the same time Ralf and I said, "Wanna bet?" then we all had a little laugh; and for that minute, I felt happy. Like nothing could ruin that moment. Then it was gone.

The next day was nearly the same; except I went to the target practice station. I grabbed a set of knives and positioned myself in front of a target. I knew that today I have to prove myself; I have to show the others that I have as good a chance as they do at winning this. I grab a knife and get a feel for its weight. A bit heavier than what I had back in 10, but it had a good feel to it. I held it and threw it at a target 15 feet away. I stare in disbelief at it: the blade was dead center. After a moment I realize the room was silent; everyone was looking at me. I take a deep breath and grab another blade; placing that one in the head of the target. Then I decide that I showed off enough for one day and go to practice my climbing; everyone's eyes still on me. After a few minutes, when everyone realizes I'm not going to do anything else extraordinary, they turn back to what they were doing. I tried to forget the event, but then Ralf brought it up at dinner.

"Mabel is really good at throwing knives."

"Oh really? Just how good are you?" asked Nathaniel.

"I'm not that good," I reply softly, staring at my plate.

"Don't be so modest. You hit that target dead center in the chest on your first throw and in the head on your second. You were amazing."

"Really? That's impressive."

"I guess so."

"You guess so? Please. Mabel, you could get a 10 or 11 if you did that for your scoring. Well, if they pay attention and watch you…" said Hannah.

The rest of the night we devoted to strategy in training and the arena. The more and more we talked, the more it dawned on me that no matter how good you are, you could still die; like my brother. He had gotten a 10, the highest that year. And he died, because of a half second of letting his guard down. I realize that I don't just have to be a good killer and fighter, but I have to be clever, alert, cunning, and focused. I had no idea how complicated it was to survive; or at least, I'd never thought about that…

The following days of training went smoothly. Ralf and I didn't go to the same stations, but I worked on my snares and climbing. At dinner each night we retold our day; Ralf seemed to be getting better at his aim, and I was getting better at my snares. Well, I got good enough to the point that I wouldn't starve.

The interviews weren't as bad as I thought they would be. The day before and of we spent going over manners, practice questions, how to present ourselves, and for me, how to walk in high heels. I got the hang of the shoes after two and a half hours of walking around the penthouse. My feet ache horribly, as does the rest of me from falling several times. I wanted to give up after the first half hour, but Hannah and Gallia kept pushing me and encouraging me to keep walking around. Ralf's occasional snickers weren't helpful though. And finally, after hours of anticipation, it was time. I stood in front of Ralf in line, wearing a beautiful floor length satin gown, in a luxurious sky blue with a shear black cover over it. It draped over my left shoulder and gave me the appearance of someone much older, much more important. My hair was piled ornately on my head in curls, with two down to frame my face. This time the makeup was simple, smoky black and blue around my eyes, and light color on my cheeks and lips. When I took a look at myself in the mirror, I thought that I was looking at a beautiful woman with dark hair and warm skin, until she moved like I did, and I realized the woman in the mirror was me. In line, I was full of confidence. Ralf however, seeming on the verge of a meltdown. I tried to calm him, but nothing helped. All too soon, it was my turn. I heard my queue, and stepped forward onto the stage. As I walked towards the host, Ceaser Flickerman, I smiled and waved at the cheering citizens.

"Welcome, Mabel," said Ceaser as we sat down. "How do you feel about being tribute for your district?"

When I spoke, I felt as though it wasn't me, but someone else. "Oh, I feel so honored. All the same though, I am a little scared."

"Scared? Why?"

"Well, as you all know, my brother was tribute a few years back, and he got so far then, well, you know what happened. I just don't want that to happen to me."

"Of course you don't. Nor do we, right folks?" he asked the crowd. They reply with renewed cheering. When they quiet down he asks, "Now, are you concerned about being the youngest tribute this year? Do you feel that puts you at a disadvantage?"

"No, I'm not concerned. I feel it gives me a bit of an advantage. Since the others are older and stronger, they may think I'm not one to worry about until the end."

"And you think they are wrong?"

"Yes, I do. I think that I can win actually."

"Is that why you volunteered?" Oh, no. I knew we would get to this… And again it felt as if someone else had taken control of my voice,

"Well, yes and no. I thought I could survive, but that's not why I volunteered. That little girl that got picked was a friend of mine and the oldest of 5. She lost her older sister in the Games when I lost my brother."

"How touching. Now, our time is nearly up." This brought shouts of people wanting to hear more, but they quieted as soon as we stood up. "Ladies and gentlemen, Mabel Ramour!" Ceaser cried as he raised my right hand above my head. The cheering and clapping from the crowd was almost deafening.

Later that night, I once again snuck off to the roof-top garden. I spent hours up there, thinking and staring at the Capitol and the stars overhead. My interview certainly went well. Sadly, Ralf's didn't go as well as mine. He gave short, quick answers, and didn't loosen up at all. I felt sorry for him.

The only hurdle left to jump over was the individual scoring. I got really nervous; it was horrible. My hands were shaky and sweaty; I was afraid I'd miss the target and look like an utter fool. My brother had done so well, what if I fail miserably? In the end, I threw with amazing accuracy, even with my nerves and the Gamemakers staring at me, watching me like a mysterious creature. I scored a 10, like my brother and Ralf got a 4. He didn't what to talk about what he had done; and for his sake I hope he has a good strategy.

That night I was yet again trapped in the horrifying nightmare of my brother's death, over and over. Sometimes I was there, and I couldn't stop the bleeding, and it was my fault…

I didn't sleep well the last few night s in the Capitol.


	4. Chapter 4

"Rise and shi-ine! Today is a very important day!" said Gallia. I groaned. Today is an important day. Today is possibly my last day alive. I got up anyway; after all, it's not like I slept much.

"Morning," said Hannah. "Are you ready?"

"Ready as I'll ever be. I mean, who can ever be ready to enter a death tournament?"

"True. Come on, let's go."

And so we left. We were taken to another building and then taken out the back into a hovercraft. When we all were strapped in, an attendant came around and gave everyone shots. When she got to me, I was scared, but gave her my arm anyway. It hurt and it felt like something solid was injected into my arm. Soon we were flying away to the arena. After hours of staring out a window, it and all the others turned black. That must mean we're close. To me, we were all too soon at the arena, waiting to be given the signal to step into the tubes. The uniforms this year are baggy cameo cargo pants, brown lace-up boots that seem good for hiking and climbing, a brown t-shirt, and a black rain jacket. As I sat there waiting, I fiddled with my necklace, which happens to be my mother's and my district token. It's a simple chain with a silver pendent shaped like a horseshoe.

Then comes the warning, and I step into the tube and it closes around me. When the time comes, I slowly rise to the surface and am blinded for a moment by the bright sunlight. When my eyes are adjusted, I look around. All 24 of us are standing in a circle around the Cornucopia. Across the circle from me is a forest. I stole a glance behind me; there's tall grassland behind and to the left, and a vast lake to my right. With 20 seconds remaining, I look to the items at the ground near me. Lo and behold, a set of throwing knives is at my feet. Near them is a tan backpack filled with who knows what. And closest to me is a spear. 10 seconds left, and I tense; ready to make sure I get those 3 items. 5 seconds….. 4…3….2….1. And the gong sounds, and I take off scooping up the backpack, knives, and the spear before taking off to the lake. I run and run and run. After what feels like a long time, I stop and turn around. I'm a far distance from the Cornucopia, and it seems no one followed me. Then a cannon booms, and another; in addition to the ones that sounded while I ran, that makes four deaths in the first, um, 20 minutes, maybe? I wish I had a watch or something. I turn to the grass and realize that it's a good 7 or 8 feet tall. I head into the grass and simply keep heading away from the Cornucopia. After a few hours, or maybe more, I stopped and took out a knife. I then proceeded to cut some of the grass and weave a small hut-like thing. While I made it, I heard 2 canons go off. When I finished, the sun was setting and I decided to make the last of the daylight by looking at the items in my bag. I opened it and inside was jerky, granola, 6 protein bars, water purification tablets, an empty canteen, sunglasses, rope and a sleeping bag. There is 20 throwing knives in the set I grabbed, and the spear is the right size for me. As the sun set beyond the horizon, I ate a piece of jerky and a small handful of granola. If I keep eating like this, I have enough granola for 5 more meals and enough jerky for 7 or 8. Soon the sky was dark and the anthem began to play. 6 dead today; but who? As I watch, I learn it's the District 3 girl, District 5 boy, District 7 boy, both from District 9, and the girl from 11. Now there are 18 of us left. I comfort myself with the fact that I am alive and I hadn't killed yet. I dosed all night, waking at every noise.

I got up at first light, and packed up. I had no idea what to do with my shelter. I knew I was being stupid, but I simply left it and headed back towards the lake. I need water. I spent at least 2 hours getting back to the lake. When I got there, I filled my canteen and dropped in a tablet. After waiting long enough for it to work, I drank deeply. I hadn't realized how thirsty I was. After a few minutes, I had drained it. So, I refilled it and put the tablet in, then put the canteen in my bag. I sat there on the bank for awhile and ate a piece of jerky. Before I left, I could feel the day getting hot, and I jumped in, soaking myself. I climbed out, gathered my things and headed towards the forest. I got to the edge after a few hours, and I kept walking, and soon I felt the land begin to slope. As I hiked along, a thought came to me; the Gamemakers hadn't disturbed me with any traps or anything. How odd. I decided it was best to stay alert.

Soon I heard leaves rustle ahead of me. I looked around and hid in some bushes. From there I crawled to face the direction of the noise and found myself staring into a clearing. At least 7 tributes were standing in a circle around something. Or _someone_.

"What do you say Pike? Should we kill her slowly?" asked a dark haired girl. I couldn't see any of their numbers.

"Slowly is fitting Lily. No one steals from us. Right guys?" said a very large boy that must be Pike.

The others nodded. "But what about the other one? She helped her hide from us," said another girl, this one fair haired.

"Very true Sara," said another boy.

"I say she can die quickly," said a third girl. "That okay with you, Alexander? Jake? Jessie? Sara? Lily? Pike?" Each of them nodded in turn. The circle shifted and I saw two girls tied up in the middle of the circle. The one girl started to scream.

"No! NO! PLEASE! I'M SORRY! NO!"

"Shut up," said the third girl that had spoken. She pulled out a knife as she stepped forward. She stepped around the girl, who was trying to move away and still screaming. She stepped behind her and grabbed her head.

"Any last words for the cameras?"

She whimpered. As the girl sliced her neck I closed my eyes. Then the cannon sounded and the other girl started to try to run.

"Oh no, you don't!" cried Pike and he grabbed her by her hair. "I know just how you can die." And he sliced her stomach.

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" she cried. Then fell limp. Next thing I knew I was charging out of the bushes at them. They all turned and the one girl with the knife smiled at ran towards me while the others left. As she came closer I could see she was from district 6. I took my spear and plunged it into her heart as her knife cut deep into my left arm. The cannon boomed. With no one else in the clearing, I turned to the bodies of the two girls. The one was from 5 and the other was from 12. I walked over to her and noticed she was still breathing. I knelt down next to her and looked at the cut.

"I'm sorry, but your cut, it's too deep. I can't save you," I said in a low voice.

"It's ok. I-I'm ready to- to go. Thank- thank you for your kindne-ness," she said, and then the girl from 12 was gone and the cannon sounded. I straightened her body and crossed her hands over her heart, and then did the same with the girls from 5 and 6. Then I left the clearing following the slope downward. Soon the sun began to set and I decided that it would be best to spend the night in a tree. I climbed up a tree as high as I could given the size of branches. By the time I got up there, my arm was burning and aching. I removed my rain coat to look at the cut, and I couldn't believe I hadn't bled to death. As I was looking at it, a parachute came down. I opened it and there was healing crème, a small sewing kit, numbing crème, and an ace bandage. There was also a note from Hannah and Nathaniel: 'Be careful; they don't like how you treated those bodies. Heal quickly and stay alert.' _Well that's comforting. Why don't they just say that I'm a dead man walking?_ Then I looked at the sewing kit and at my cut and I realized what it all was for. _I have to stitch my arm up._ I rub the numbing crème on the cut and surrounding area, smearing blood everywhere. The cut is an inch above my elbow, and it's a huge gash across my arm. When the crème took effect, I took the needle and began to stitch my arm. As the light faded, it began to be very hard to see what I was doing, so I put some healing crème on it and wrapped it up. Then the anthem began to play and I could just see through the trees. Only the 3 girls died today; and there are 15 of us left. Hard to believe it, but there are 9 dead in 2 days.


	5. Chapter 5

I woke up again with the sun, and took a look at my cut. The healing crème was effective, but my sewing is horrible. I just covered it back up again. I climbed down and began to walk while drinking some water and eating some jerky.

I walked all day and heard 2 cannons. Near sunset, I got to the bottom of the slope and there was a river. I had finished my canteen hours ago, and I was terribly thirsty, so I filled it and drank deeply. Then I stopped, ate a little and finished it. Then I climbed up a tree for the night and settled back to sleep. The anthem played and the boys from 8 and 12 died today. Then I feel asleep.

In the morning I filled my canteen and headed upstream. After I'd walked a little ways, it began to rain. And not lightly either: it was pouring. I looked around for shelter and saw a small outcropping on a rock. I ran over to it and stood underneath. It was nice, I suppose. Dry and sheltered from the rain at least. I soon realized I wasn't alone. The gray lump against the wall that I thought was a rock _moved_.

I tensed, and soon they moved so that they were facing me.

"Ralf?" I asked, relaxing a little. He looked horrible. He was grayish and his face looked sunken. "Are you- I mean, have you been eating?"

"No," he said, his voice barely audible over the rain. "I haven't eaten or anything since we got here. I found this cave, and I've stayed in it."

I dug through my bag and pulled out a piece of jerky. "Ralf, eat this. Please."

"No."

"Come on. You'll die if you don't."

"That's the point."

I sat back. "So you gave up? You're not even going to try?"

"Something like that. The way I see it, I'll die if I don't eat and I'll die if I do, so what's the difference?"

"If you eat you have a fighting chance," I said quietly.

I left it at that because he fell asleep. I feel asleep hours later, after the sky got darker and I learned that no one had died.

For the next two days it kept pouring and only the girl from 7 and the boy from 6 died. Ralf still refused to eat or drink and I could tell that he was near the end. Then the rain began to slow. I saw a flash of light, and heard thunder rumble. Nothing new, it was a storm and there had been thunder for awhile. Then a rabbit darted past. And another and another and a squirrel and birds and then I heard a dull roar…

"Ralf we have to move. Now."

"Wha-?"

"Fire, no buts, you're coming with me," I said, shoving his things in the bag he must of grabbed.

"I'll hold you back. Leave me here. Live. You can't save me."

"But I can try!" I realized I had shouted. "Now come on." I got him up and supported him. If we could make it to the river… it's only a few yards away…

But that proved to be too far.

The fire was practically on us, and there were some roots in the way. Ralf tripped and we both fell.

"Come on, get up." I coughed. The smoke was so thick.

"Go… GO!" he cried. "My ankle, I can't move-"

"I can't leave you!" Then a tree fell, I jumped out of the way. When I looked back, the tree was were Ralf was and the fire was rapidly approaching. I ran for the river. I couldn't help him anymore.

I plunged into the water but kept running. I had to get away from the fire. I glanced over my shoulder and stopped. The fire just _stopped_. It just didn't continue. Though puzzled, I stepped onto the bank. I rummaged through Ralf's stuff. Good thing I'd thought to carry it. He didn't have much: some food, a canteen, water purification, and of course, his blanket. I shoved it all in my bag.

Then I heard buzzing. I soon found myself being chased by tracker jackers. I got stung a few times and the world in front of me shifted. Things were different- strange colors and I swear a squirrel tried to eat me- and something burned my arm from the inside, and I had to get it out and it ITCHED. I scratched and scratched and my hand felt wet. Then I passed out.

When I woke up, I had a few welts, but my main concern was my arm. It was coated in dried blood. I had no clue what had happened. I went back to the stream and cleaned up as best I could. Then I tried to fix my arm. It hurt to move it, but I had to in order to survive. I decided to stay put for the day.

The day after that, it finally stopped raining. I didn't know where I was, but I headed uphill anyway. When I broke through the tree line, I found myself by the Cornucopia. And within killing range of Careers. Thankfully, they didn't notice me, and I snuck back into the trees.

Now that I had my bearings, I headed towards the tall grasses. Then I heard two cannons one right after the other. I kept walking, and when I felt that I'd gone far enough and should settle down for the night, I wove another grass shelter. Then I sat in it and ate.

While the last few days had been relatively uneventful for me, the next day was very interesting. I woke up and as I was packing, a girl charged through the grass and knocked me over. I jumped up and grabbed my spear, pointing it at her.

"Don't kill me! I'm- I'm unarmed!"

"That's not a good reason." I then noticed she was from 2. "You're a Career, aren't you?"

"No. Just because I'm from a Career district doesn't mean I am one."

"Why were you running?"

"Because I screwed up and started part of the food supply on fire. They were able to put it out but they're still going to kill me."

"Okay…. Who are you?"

She seemed confused, and answered slowly. "Jessie…. I'm 16…. Why do you care?"

"Because we might be able to help each other. And obviously you're telling the truth because I'd be dead if this were a trap." Then I offered my hand to help her up. She hesitated, and then grabbed my hand and I pulled her to her feet.

We sat down and talked. She filled me in on all sorts of things. Eventually we got to talking about the second day in the arena: the day I saw the group in the clearing.

"Why were y'all so angry? I mean, what did she take that was so important?"

"It sounds stupid now, but she took and bow and quiver and some food early that morning. Pike, he's the boy from 4, woke up and saw her running into the woods were the other girl was waiting. He woke the rest of us and then we started searching from them. We found them and tied them up and well, you saw the rest."

"I still don't understand why y'all just left. I was outnumbered 6 to 1!"

"Well, they want to leave you alone until the end. They think that you were just bluffing during your interview, when you said you thought you could win. And they thought that the girl from 6 could handle you, and if she didn't, she was one less person to worry about. They really do think you are an easy kill though."

"I think I can play that to my advantage." We were quiet for awhile, and then Jessie said, "Hard to believe it's been twelve days."

"Yea," I said. "Hey, how many of us are left?"

"Let me think… There would have been 9 left yesterday, and then Lily killed the boy from 3, that's eight, but she died from injuries, so now there are 7: me, you, Sara and Alexander from 1, Jake, he's from 2, Pike, and I think the girl from 8 but I'm not sure."

"Wow." I felt like I had missed a day or two. We didn't talk much more and when the sun went down, no one had died. It was the same the next day, and Jessie and I had walked to the lake for water. But the day after was interesting.

Jessie and I woke early, but neither of us knew why. Then we noticed something in the air. The air smelled like smoke and we could hear a distant roar. We looked at each other and knew what it was: fire. Again. I grabbed my bag and we took off, running in the water. Soon we slowed, in an effort to be quiet. We got to the edge of the grass and peeked around to see the Cornucopia. The forest was on fire. The Careers were freaking out and hauling water to put it out with no avail. Looking around farther, the far edge of the grassland was on fire. We knew we could do nothing and simply made a shelter for the night.


	6. Chapter 6

As it turned out, the fire had claimed two lives: Sara and the girl from 8. Since we foolishly had stayed close to the Careers, we stayed quiet. Around midday, we heard arguing. Then one of the boys came over for water. His number was 1 and I knew that meant he was Alexander. I killed him before he could yell or unsheathe his sword. After the cannon, we heard more arguing and then another cannon and silence. Darkness came and Alexander and Jake had died. That left me, Jessie, and Pike.

In the morning, we knew we had no better option but to face Pike. It would have to happen sooner or later; I preferred later, but knew that wasn't an option. I held a knife ready and Jessie held the spear. We walked stealthily around to the Cornucopia, hoping Pike didn't see us. We didn't see him, but he found us. He snuck up behind us and killed Jessie. I bolted, heading towards the water with the only thought racing though me was to get away from him.

I got to the water before he caught up and we fought. I had my knife and he had a bigger one. I scratched him, and was too quick for him to cut me. He lunged and knocked me down into the water. I had dropped my knife and now, fighting not to breathe water, fumbled around looking for my knife, a rock, anything. Then my hand found a rock and I grabbed it and aimed to hit somewhere in the region of his head. After that, everything went black.

I found myself in a dark tunnel. Ahead of me was a bright white light. I could hear someone calling my name.

"Mom?" I called.

"Come here sweetie," she said.

"Mom!" I cried running towards her. By her I could see my brother and I got closer and I could see their faces, their arms reaching out to me… Just as I was about to grab her hand I was pulled back. I ran towards them again and they kept getting farther and farther away…

Then my eyes flew open and I gasped. There were doctors all around me and a bright light shining in my face.

"You gave us quite a scare Mabel. You should get some rest now," said one of the doctors. Suddenly I felt very sleepy and my eyes drooped until I couldn't keep then open anymore.

When I woke up I was in a white room with no windows. I was lying in a hospital bed and there were tubes in my arm. I wasn't sure what they were but I left them alone. I lifted the sleeve of my hospital gown to look at my poor attempts at stitching, but it had been cleaned and the stitches removed. I began to gingerly poke it when I found myself falling asleep again. The next time I woke up there was some food and water. I ate hungrily and then sat back, thinking about what must have happened.

I must have won, probably by mere seconds. I think I almost died. I saw my mom and my brother, but couldn't remember if my dad was there…

I began to cry and once more fell into a deep sleep.

When I woke up again, there was more food and water. I ate, and fell asleep. The next time I woke, the tubes in my arm were gone, and there was an outfit on the edge of the bed. I climb out and begin to dress when I notice what the clothes are: a set like what all the tributes wore in the arena. I dropped it like it was on fire and backed away. Then I realized that it's what I will meet my team in. I hesitantly pull it on. Then the door opens and I step into an empty hall with no doors. I hear voices, and head towards them. The hall opens to a room, and I see my prep team, Hannah, Nathanial and Gallia. I'm shocked at how relieved I am to see them. We exchange greetings and they congratulate me. They are sympathetic about my arm.

"What about it?" I am confused.

"They didn't tell you?" asks Nathaniel. I shake my head. "It's not your arm. It's robotic." I'm floored. I start to sway and sit down. "They couldn't patch up your arm good enough, it was too damaged. So, they replaced it."

I can't believe it. My left arm is no longer mine. But it seems so real, so natural…

I don't have much time to contemplate my fate because I'm whisked away to be prepped. I'm showered, manicured, and my makeup is on; my stylist comes in with my dress and slips me into it. It's a soft green strapless dress that falls to just past my knees. I notice padding in the dress and point it out.

"Your mentors refused to have you surgically altered." He said it like he couldn't imagine why. I make a mental note to thank them later, especially since I feel like I'm already large for my size. Then I take note of the strapless part. I look at my new left arm. There are no surgical scars, no signs that it is not mine. I also notice I don't look as thin as I should. Somehow I look healthy. Then I pull on my shoes, which are soft leather sandals, and I get irritated by my hair. They had left most of it lose, pulling back enough that I can't hide my face in it. I am then taken down to a room below the stage for the interviews. My prep team leaves, and Hannah comes in.

"Nervous?"

"A little," I admit.

"You did great so far," she says as she hugs me. Then her voice becomes more urgent. "Be careful what you say and do from now on. You cared too much in there, and then you somehow outsmarted their trackers. Just be careful." Then she pulls away. She squeezes my hands and leaves. I'm left alone to mull over what she just told me. I realize I have to seem innocent and unknowing of what I did. Then the anthem began to play. I heard the crowd cheer as my prep team, stylist, escort, and mentor come on stage. Then the platform I am standing on begins to rise. As I come into view of the crowd, they go berserk, cheering louder than ever. Then Caesar Flickerman leads me to my chair, and the program begins.

The highlights start with the bloodbath. I know they will show my reaction once in awhile, so I try to keep my face calm. But the more I see, the harder it gets, and I know that I look shocked, even appalled. It moves on to when I broke into the clearing. It then jumps after I kill the girl from 6 to the Careers and all they did. They show me running from the fire and getting attacked by trackerjackers, and then I see how I survived. The girl from 8 past by me, and instead of killing me, she hides me and treats my stings. Then something scared her off. I realize I owe her my life, and I can't repay her, ever. It unsettles me. After that, they skip to when Jessie ran into my camp. From there, to the second fire, the Careers' argument (they were fighting over who would kill me, even though I'd done pretty much nothing), Alexander's death, and Jake's, then to our attempt to sneak up on Pike to the end.

What unnerved me most was how enraged I seemed when I killed the girl from 6. I didn't look like me.

Then President Snow came out, followed by a girl carrying the victor's crown. I'm crowned victor, and the crowd cheers. By the time I'm allowed to go, my cheeks hurt from smiling, and I'm tired of waving. But I get no rest because I'm taken away to a party. I spend hours taking to Capitol people who get drunk as the night goes on. Shaking their hands, being polite, it was all very taxing and boring. I was glad when the night was done.

Back in my room, I passed out. It was the first time I got real sleep since the reaping. The next day, I was prepped for my final interview. This time I wore a cream eyelet lace dress with a thin leather belt around my waist, and ankle cowboy boots. The dress came to my knees and had three quarter length sleeves. My makeup was simple, soft pink on my cheeks and lips, and pale brown around my eyes. I actually look a little like me. Then I go out to the sitting area, where the interview will be held. There are only a few cameras. I'm grateful there isn't another live audience.

I sit and the countdown begins. Then Caesar begins the interview.

"How do you feel about being the youngest victor?"

"Well, it's certainly interesting. I'm going to be remembered for a long time. But mostly, I'm just glad to be alive and going home."

"Is there anyone waiting for you there?"

"Yes. There is a family that is like my second family, and I can't wait to see them."

"I'm sure they can't wait to see you. Now, did you have any strategies that helped you in the arena?"

"I'm not really sure. Mostly I tried to avoid anyone bigger than me and stay hydrated."

"Wasn't everyone bigger than you?"

I laugh. They were all bigger than me. "Well, yes, and in the end avoiding someone bigger wasn't easy. Especially when he's chasing you."

Now it was Caesar's turn to laugh. Then he asked about my arm.

"Oh, I didn't even notice. The doctors did a wonderful job. I can't tell it's not my arm." Except I can. The skin feels all wrong.

After that it was just easy banter, and Caesar signs off. After that I go to my room to collect a few things, but find nothing to grab. My necklace had always been on me, and I had nothing else important.

From there I took a car to the train station. The train started moving and I finally relaxed. I was on my way home. I changed into gray pants and a purple shirt. I washed off my makeup and braided my hair. I felt like I was finding myself again.

A few hours later I was home. It felt good, but I couldn't help but notice how bad it stank from all the livestock. I knew I'd get used to it, but in the meantime, it was horrible.


	7. Chapter 7

Over the next few weeks, I hardly had a free moment. There was a banquet to attend, and a district holiday. I loved it; everyone got a break for awhile and could fill their bellies. Then there was the first Parcel Day. That was my favorite. Children running around with the smaller contents of the parcels: applesauce, canned meat, and candy. At home there were sacks of grain and beans. Everyone in the district got one. I felt like I did when I handed out my tessere.

When I turned twelve, I was depressed. I had no blood family left. I only had my old neighbors, and I hardly got to see them since I lived with the Furrows. I had food, but I knew they didn't, and many had kids that weren't old enough to sign up for a tessere. I had an idea: sign up for them. And that's exactly what I did. Over the years, the number of slips with my name on them kept growing, since it was cumulative. That's why I had so many this year.

Now all I can guarantee is a parcel once a month for the next year. It felt like so little.

After things quieted down, the cameras left. I felt liberated. No more fake smiles and constant warm attitude. I could be me, except for one small problem: the whole thing about the tracker. What had Hannah meant? I hadn't had a chance to ask for details.

I went over to her house one day. She answered the door.

"Hey, Mabel. What do you need?"

"I was wondering about what you meant by what you told me before the highlights." She glanced around, and then spoke in a low voice.

"Not here. Let me get my shoes and we'll go for a walk." I was puzzled, but waited. We walked a short ways to about halfway between Victor's Circle and the main square. There are 7 victors now, but it's still not used often.

Hannah spoke. "Okay, so when you got stung by the tracker jackers, you scratched up your arm. Well, somehow you disabled or removed the tracking device they had placed in you. They thought you hadn't moved. Then you appear on nearly the other side of the arena with that girl from 2, alive and well. They were baffled. The Head Gamemaker is rumored to have been executed. They think that you somehow knew to remove it, and that you were conscious of your actions."

"Oh," I say softly. I sound like a child. "I had no idea. I can hardly remember what happened when I got stung."

"I know, but they don't. Just be careful." Then we walk back to Victor's Circle and go home.

Well, 'home' isn't exactly fitting. They are more like mansions. My home is where I grew up with my brother. This place… it makes it harder to act like the Games never happened. And I wanted to forget so much. I wanted to forget that I did better than my brother; to forget that I lost my arm; to forget that I couldn't save Ralf from himself; to forget that I couldn't repay the girl from 8. I haven't even learned her name…

I spent most of my days walking around the district helping where and how I could. I gave money and food away. I helped rebuild the chicken coop so it was sturdier after it fell during a storm. Little things to keep me busy. I figured that was my hobby. But I had my doubts about it passing for a victor's hobby in the Capitol, so I learned how to knit and crotchet. I made lace and scarves and different things. I got really good too. Most of the lace I made was sold in the Capitol. The hats and scarves and other things I made a passed out here. Everyone is always thankful, and I feel like I'm doing something helpful. In the northern part of the district, it gets rather cold during the winter months. Everyone could do with a little extra warmth. Plus I had plenty of time to do things, and I tried to get out and away from my house as much as I could. It was so empty and echoed with the dream that my brother could have won this, not me.

I had invited the Packards to come stay with me, where it'd be warm in the winter and cool in the summer and there'd always be food, but they respectfully declined. I brought them food a lot though and hired Mrs. Packard to clean the place. Not that it was messy, it's just I had to help them somehow. They insist that I did more than I ever needed to when I volunteered, but they are still a big family and I'm alone and have more than they could ever imagine.

Then came the Victory Tour.

I think they purposely placed it half-way between the games so that they never really go away. And that's for everyone: the victor, the mentors, the families, and the districts- everyone that lost someone because of it. But I know that the games will never leave me. I have nightmares almost every night about me or my brother. The games never really leave you.

The day I was to leave, my prep team arrived, as well as my stylist and Gallia. Hannah came over, too. I was prepped for the cameras, and put in a red velvet dress. I got black fuzzy boots and matching earmuffs and muffler. I got a beautiful cloak edged with soft fur. My makeup was soft, yet warm and they painted tiny holly berries under my right eye. I was like a winter princess.

When I was ready, we went outside. There were more cameras than I thought there would be, but I kept my calm and acted happy all through the crowd. When we got on the train, I stopped acting. I wanted to plop down and eat and sleep, but I had to rehearse my speech for District 12. I practiced late into the night. Then I went to my compartment and took off the dress. I didn't bother looking for nightclothes and just crawled under the blankets and fell asleep.

In the morning, I was given a red sweater and brown pants to wear. The rest stayed the same. Then we waited to arrive in 12. I nibbled on a strawberry. When we finally arrived, I was escorted off the train and to the Justice Building. My hair and makeup were touched up and then I waited in the hall to go out for my speech. I braced myself to see the dead tributes parents. If only I had acted sooner, maybe the girl from 12 would have lived longer… maybe she would be here instead… or maybe the girl from 8…

_Stop it,_ I told myself. _You're alive and now there's nothing you can do about it. Stop feeling so guilty. There was nothing you could have done._ I tried to believe it. I really tried. Then the doors opened and I walked out to face District 12.


	8. Chapter 8

The Victory Tour wasn't so bad. I'll admit going to 1, 6 and 4 was daunting and being there was quite scary, but it was only for a few hours. And for that, I was grateful. 8 was heartbreaking: the girl's name was Lillian Thoms and she had three younger siblings, one of them a girl my age. She had volunteered for her.

I thought about the past several days as I ate a piece of toast. Today was the last day of the tour, and we're almost to the Capitol. Breathe in, out, in, out. I sipped on some water, drummed my fingers on the table, pace around the car, water, fingers, pace, water, fingers, pace, water- enough! I made it out of the arena alive. I should fear nothing, and yet I'm more afraid than I have ever been. I guess being in the Games has made me think about how short life is, how easily it is taken from us.

The cycle of the Games must be broken somehow. But, when will the Districts have the courage to rebel? Probably not in my lifetime. Probably not for many generations. But maybe someday, just maybe, something will happen and the Districts will fight back and overthrow the Capitol.

Then my thoughts were interrupted by Hannah.

"It'll be alright. Just one more night and you can but this all behind you."

"Unless I mentor."

"You won't have to, at least not for a long while. I'm not going anywhere." She squeezed my hand. I allowed a small smile. "Do you want to talk?"

"About what?"

"Anything, everything. Sometimes it's just nice to babble on and on, to get things off your chest."

"Alright. Um, well I remember this one time, when my dad was teaching me and my brother how to make snares, I couldn't do it. I just kept making complex knots. Just knots, knots that were hard to undo and had no purpose. But my dad kept showing me what to do, how to do it, and making me try again and again. I got so frustrated. My brother had gotten it, but I couldn't. I wanted to give up, but my dad kept telling me that I'd get it if I kept trying. I believed him for awhile, but then I grew tired of it and stormed off. I wouldn't speak to him, I was so angry. Three days later, he disappeared." My cheeks were streaked with tears. "I-I didn't even say goodbye to him before he went to work. I was so stupid!" I sobbed.

"Hush, hush sweetheart. You were young, you didn't know."

"It was still juvenile and stupid!"

"Don't beat yourself up about it. What's done is done. Tell me another story."

I sniffed. "Okay," I said, and I did. I told story after story, I poured out my very soul in those words. Hannah was right. Sometimes it is nice to just talk. And my nerves disappeared. I lost track of time. And then I was whisked away by the Capitol crowd, by my prep team, and off to another party with people I don't know, my image on the line and the idiocy of Capitol citizens. Lovely; it's what every girl wants. Kill me now.

The night was rather boring, that is, until the President decided to talk to me.

"Can we talk?" he asked. I knew it wasn't a request.

"Of course, Mr. President." He led me outside, so we were alone and away from the party. He got straight to the point.

"I want you to mentor next year."

"Are you, um, sure that's a good idea?"

"Quite sure." He began to leave. "Oh, and, I know who you care about, so tread lightly." Then he left. One thought raced through my mind. _He's threatening to kill Mariah._ I saved her life, and now I realize I only made her life harder by coming back. I made _my_ life harder by winning. Wonderful. Just wonderful.

I went through the rest of the party in a daze. I didn't remember what happened after that when I woke up on the train. I didn't want to get up. Maybe if I lie here awhile, I'll wake up back home and all of this will turn out to be a dream; that it's only Reaping day…

It was wishful thinking and I knew it. The only thing I could wish for now was a young death, so that my new hell will be gone.

I got up; but only to tell Hannah what Snow had said. She was worried too.

"I don't like it, but it's something we all face, sooner or later."

"What do you mean?"

"At some point, the lives of the people victors care about are hung in the balance. You screw up, one of them mysteriously dies. If you have a kid, maybe that year's Reaping will be rigged. Things like that. It happens to all of us."

I was quiet for awhile. "I have to mentor, don't I." It wasn't a question. I knew I had to, no matter how much I dreaded it. We didn't speak until we got home, and even then, it was only goodbyes. Neither of us wanted to talk about it; but now I understand why a lot of victors are alone, or turn to drugs and alcohol. I want to be better than that. The kids next year and all the years after are going to need me if they stand a chance to get home alive.

How true that is.

The next few months passed by quickly; I kept to myself, didn't really leave my house much, actually. Then came Reaping day once more. Mariah was in twice, her younger brother, Johnny, was in once. I dressed in a dark blue blouse and light gray pants. I pulled my hair back in a high pony tail; nothing fancy, but enough that I looked like I cared. I think I am more nervous than last year. Two kids are going to be relying on me to get them home, and I can only save one.

A few hours later, I was on stage for the Reaping. Nathaniel was still mentoring, so I wasn't completely alone in this endeavor. Gallia did her little thing, and plucked out a girl's name: "Gina Wald." She came forward; she's 17. And a 15-year-old will be helping her live. Then Gallia chose the boy: "Martin Hixson." He's 12; no one volunteers. At first I was surprised, but then thought about it. What I had done was a rare occurrence in District 10. The two shook hands, and became the tributes from District 10 for the 71st Hunger Games. Things proceeded as usual, and then the tributes were escorted inside. Nathaniel said goodbye to his wife and we headed to the train. We got there and waited. Nathaniel explained various things to me, gave me tips and whatnot. After an hour or so, the tributes arrived.

We talked for some time, ate, and then watched the Reapings of other districts. At least, Nathaniel and I did; the kids had gone to bed. I began to worry. The Careers this year… they're going to target 10. I just know it; especially since I'm mentoring.

I think about it late into the night. If they die… I'm going to blame myself. I won't mean to, but I will. That's just how I am. It's my heroic flaw.


	9. Chapter 9

I flopped down on my bed. I roll on to my back and stare at the ceiling. Tomorrow I go home, and will have to comfort the parents of the tributes. The 71st games are over, and some crazy girl from 4 gets to go home. All because she could swim.

Well, I suppose it was more than that. Neither of my kids could swim, I'm sure, and they hadn't lived that long anyway. The boy was killed in the Bloodbath, and the girl was stupid enough to attack the Careers.

She had amazing courage and strength, though, I'll give her that. She did kill the boy from 4. Only to be killed by falling from a high branch. If her footing was better, maybe she would have been the one to come home.

And I feel like I let it happen. _I have to do this for the rest of my life. How can I do this? How can I…_ My thoughts faded away and I let myself sleep.

Morning brought no relief. Days, weeks, months went by before I came to terms with it. And by then, it was time for another Reaping, another Game, and two more deaths.

_No, _I thought. _One will come home. I will help one get home. I can make it happen this year._

I didn't. They were both 18, and thought they could do what they wanted, that they were strong enough. They attacked the Careers during the Bloodbath, and were killed. There was nothing I could have done to prevent it; I can't make someone not be arrogant. I couldn't blame myself; it was their own stupidity that got them killed. Nathaniel and I both said, "Grab what you need and run, if you must. But get away quickly." They didn't listen. And they died. End of story.

I still cared though. I can't shake the odd feeling you get when someone you know dies. I didn't really know them, but enough that their deaths bothered me.

The year after, I awoke on Reaping day and an odd thought came to me: this year is the 73rd, and that means it's 2 more years to the next Quell. I had never thought that I'd have to mentor during a Quell. I'll be 19 and mentoring a Quell. How strange.

Even stranger was that little Mariah wasn't so little anymore at 15. Her youngest sibling is now 10. Gosh. Tom's 14 now, the twins are 11… and I'm 17. It's odd, how your age makes you feel so young, but your experiences and actions make you seem so much older… Having the Games makes us grow up so fast, especially when we're the oldest or feel alone… Or have to do unspeakable things to protect people. The Capitol owns me, and Snow makes sure I know it. It started last year, and I know this year will be no different. I have given up my last shreds of dignity and privacy to ensure that Mariah can keep her life.

I pull myself out of bed to dress. As I get ready, I chuckle at how I've dressed more feminine over the last few years. From pants to a skirt to now dresses. I remember that fateful day, I wore a green dress. It was the most beautiful thing I'd owned. Now I have so many fancy things, many courtesy of the men who stole my nights if the Capitol. I never wore those, I had put many in a box in the attic, and tried to forget that I have them and more so, how I got them.

I combed through my hair. It's so short now- a shaggy pixie really- but I like it. No more long hair. I wonder how the Capitol will react, as the Reaping will be the unveiling of my new look. I chuckle at the thought.

I shift the skirt of my dress and slip into my shoes. One final mirror check and I'm out the door. I jump the bottom step, as has become my habit, and walk over to Nathaniel's house. I knock.

"Oh, Mabel, come in, come in."

"Thanks, Mrs. Pascoe, but I can't stay for long."

"Oh, I know, but you've got to stay for a minute."

"Are you sure?" She still seemed a bit wobbly from the other day. (They'd had their first child, a girl, a few days ago.)

"I'm sure," she said closing the door behind me. "We picked her name."

"Really? What did you decide on?"

"It's not official yet, because-"

"We wanted to ask your permission first," said Nathaniel, appearing in the doorway, holding a squirming bundle of blankets.

"Why would you need to ask me?"

"We wanted to name her Sara Mabel Pascoe." It took me a moment to realize what he'd said.

"I-I'm honored, but why me?"

"Because you're a wonderful young lady. You've done so much for the district. We want her to be like you: helpful, brave, caring."

"Thank you, I didn't realize I had such an impact."

"You have. So, can we name her after you?"

"Yes. It's alright with me."

"Thank you."

"And Mabel? If anything happens to us, will you take care of her?"

"Of course. You know me; I'll do what I can."

"Thank you," said Mrs. Pascoe, squeezing me tightly. Then we went to the square for the Reaping. Little Sara was going to witness her first Reaping already. Nathaniel and I sat on stage, and waited for the Reaping to be over.

A man took the stage. He said what was normally said, and when he was halfway through, I finally realized that something was wrong.

"Where's Gallia?" I whispered to Nathaniel.

"No clue. He must be her replacement though."

"I have a bad feeling about this."

"So do I." The man finished his little speech, and went to pick the girl's name first. A 13-year-old girl mounted the stage. Then he went to pick the boy's name. He took his time, and my suspicions rose with each passing second. He finally grabbed one. He read it, and my heart dropped. It can't be, no, not him. It couldn't be- but it is. I fought to stay calm as he mounted the stage. I silently begged for someone to volunteer. No one stepped forward. How can I mentor this year? If he dies, I could never forgive myself.

**AN: Dun, dun, dun! A cliffhanger! I shall reveal the boy tribute's identity in the next chapter. Hope you've enjoyed so far. These Games will be quick, so I can get to the Rebellion, but I couldn't resist this twist! (And yes, I did hint that Mabel goes through the same stuff as Finnick, so if you caught that, I applaud you. If you didn't, read **_**Mockingjay, **_**specifically Finnick's confession.) Thanks for reading!**


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